Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Easy Stuffed Tomatoes

Stuffed tomatoes are a pretty good thing. You can eat them pretending to be eating vegetable. Meanwhile the vegetable it's the excuse, the real deal it's the stuffing.
Therefore let me give you a very nice and easy stuffed tomatoes recipe.

INGREDIENTS

Tomatoes (Big round juicy ones)
Ground beef
Olive oil
Slices of melty cheese
Seasoned bread crumbs
Oregano
Black pepper
Salt

So, let's get-a-started !

- Cut the top of the tomatoes
- Empty the inside of the tomatoes with spoons
- Place the inside of tomatoes in frying pan
- Place olive oil and ground beef in frying pan and start cooking
- After the ground beef/tomato mixture is cooked season it with salt, pepper, oregano
- Mix the ground beef/tomato with bread crumbs
- Fill the tomatoes with the stuffing and let them cook for half an hour or so at 190 Celsius

(If you want to know the Fahrenheit temperatue use a converter, you lazy fellow)

- When they are almost done cooking place slice of melty cheese on top of them
- Eat

These tomatoes are nice and tasty and simple. So go make them and pretend to be an healty fellow.




Monday, September 24, 2012

Limoncello Shabam

Here's another cocktail recipe. This one is kind of weird tasting, but after a few of them the taste kind of grows into you.
For this cocktail thou shalt need : 

Limoncello (Souther Italian sweet lemon liqueur)
Vodka
Red Bull (Or some other comparable energy drink)
Grapefruit Juice
Ice







Pour an equal amount of every ingredient (Or different amounts. Whatever) over ice, in an Old Fashioned glass. Stirr, enjoy.

This drink is best drunk at 6pm, possibly in the middle of the week. Usually weird cocktais are usually drunk during wild friday night type of deals. So drinking these on a stupid mid-week night can bring nice feelings of weirdness upon you.

If you do not find Limoncello you can always make your own, by the way. Find some fancy Italian lemons, or some stupid ones if you cannot find the fancy ones. Use only the zest of the lemon.
Place the lemon zest in grain alchohol (The higher proof the better). Let it sit for a week or so in dry place (Not exposed to direct sunlight. Shake the container every once and a while). Then strain the results and mix them with simple syrup (What quantities? How about you do some trial and error instead of relying on me).

And that is it


Gyro/Cashews Pasta

How about combining gyro/kebab beef meat and pasta? I'd say yes.
I consider this pasta to be a variation of my Pistachios pasta. But this one is way more fat. So, if you fill like stuffing your face with awesome greasy pasta keep reading things.






YOU SHALL NEED

Kebab/Gyro Beef Meat
Onions
Pancetta
Olive Oil
Cream
Cashews
Pasta
Pecorino/Parmesan cheese

Step 1 : Cook the onions and the pancetta in a pan with olive oil

Step 2 : Make water boil

Step 3 : Once the water is boiling add pasta and salt to water

Step 4: While you wait for pasta to be done mix the cream and the gyro meat with the onion/pancetta mixture

Step 5 : Grind up finely some cashews, grind up chunkyli some other cashews

Step 6 : When the pasta is done drain it, and mix it with the cream/gyro/onion/pancetta condiment

Step 7 : Place pasta in dish and put ground up cashews and cheese on top

Step 8 : Eat

This pasta is the stuff of legends. It has so many calories and sodium that you don't even want to know. You just want to eat.

BUON APPETITO




ShortBread Cookies

Shortbread Cookies are awesome and so easily done that if you don't prepare a batch of them right now you will fail at life.




Ingredients

Butter (Let's say a cup)

Flour (Let's say a cup and a half)

Sugar (Powdered Sugar would be better. Let's say half a cup)

A tad bit of salt

Mix all the ingredients. Form cookies. Bake at 350 Fahrenheit or 180 Celsius (Which is the same amount of heat, by the way). Be careful becouse they bake really fast and you can end up with a disgusting burned mess.
See? Simple and effective. I could eat the raw shortbread dough for all my meals, in my opinion.
These cookies are very good by themselves. But they become even better when you put Dulce de Leche or Nutella on top of them.
If you feel like experimenting you can do many awesome things. You can make normal chocolate chips cookies dough and mix it half/half with the shortbread cookies dough, to obtain Chocolate Chips Shortbread Cookies. Or you can use them as a base for some sort of tart or cheesecake. Or you can mix a banana and some extra flour in the dough to obtain Shortbread Banana Cookies. Or you can dip the cookies in some good Porto.
The possibilities are endless.

BUON APPETITO


On the Importance of Ground Beef

This happens to me all the time. I go to buy groceries with friends, becouse we have to eat or restock the kitchen or something. And then the usual question appears "Soooo. I don't have any recipe in mind, I just want to buy random stuff. What are we going to get? I was thinking...".
The answer is: Ground Beef

Ground Beef is awesome. Always have it in your kitchen. What can you make with ground beef? Many things. Such as:

Hamburger
Meatballs
Ragù Sauce (Tomato Sauce with Meat)
Chili
Tacos
Stuffed Tomatoes (Or any other random vegetable you can think of)
Sausages without casing
And many other things


You can even make Hot Dogs with ground beef. That's right. They sell some sort of plastic thing that allows you to easily shape ground beef into an Hot Dog shape.
So, unless you are a vegetarian, buy ground beef. Seriously. If you have a vegetarian then don't buy it. Or buy so you can feed you non vegetarian spouse/friends/hobos



BUON APPETITO

Peanut Butter/Bacon Hot Dogs

Sounds weird? Sounds awesome?
Whatever. The important thing is the taste. And I can assure you that these hot-dogs taste like something that tastes good.

Ingredients

Peanut Butter
Bacon
Hot Dogs
Bread/Hot Dog Bun (Whatever)

So, here we go.

STEP N.1

Cook the Hot Dog and the Bacon

STEP N.2

Toast the bread. Or don't. Whatever

STEP N.3

Assemble your Hot Dog and smother it with peanut butter

STEP N.4

Eat

See? Easy enough. And tasty, very tasty. This is one of those Hot Dogs that makes you feel ashamed, but the tastiness compensates the shame you feel.
You can eat it with smooth peanut butter, or chunky peanut butter. Or, if you feel like having an adventure, you have it with almond butter or some other sort of nut butter. I've never tried it that way, but feel free to explore new realms

BUON APPETITO


Blind Russian

The Blind Russian is one of the most awesome cocktails ever. It's basically a White Russian, but it has Baileys Irish Cream rather than normal cream.
It's called a Blind russian becouse all of it's ingredients are alchohol, therefore if you drink enough of them you shall become blind (?).
Whatever. It's pretty good.

It's served on the rocks, in an Old Fashioned Glass.
To make one of these fellows you will need

Vodka
Baileys
Kahlua (Or some other coffee liqueur thing)

The normal recipe is five parts Vodka, two parts Kahlua and three parts Baileys. But feel free to change the recipe, if you want. Or if you don't want then don't do it.

This beverage tastes the best at eleven in the morning (Sunday mornings works the best). You shall wear some sort of robe and you shall not give a fuck about stuff while you drink it.

Enjoy good lads

PRO-TIP

If you are a poor fellow and cannot afford good Vodka do not worry. Buy stupid Vodka and then filter it with some sort of water jug filter type of deal. And with minimal effort you are going to obtain semi-legit Vodka


On The Importance of Spices

Let's say that you are poor. Let's say you are a college student, or a young professional, without much money or cooking expertise. You always complain that your food is bland, and tasteless. So, whenever you have some money, you use that money to order a pepperoni pizza.

WRONG

Think about all the spices that you could buy with the money you just wasted on pepperoni pizza. I am not saying that pepperoni pizza is a waste. Pepperoni pizza is awesome, when you have money. But when you don't have money it's not that awesome.
Spices, like I said, can turn a shitty meal into an awesome meal.
Let's say you only have pasta and some stupid cheese. You want to make Mac and Cheese? Meh.
But what if you also had soy sauce and tabasco sauce? Weird Mac and Cheese time? Hell yeah!
Let's say you only have bananas and bread. You want to make a grilled banana sandwhich? Meh
But what if you also had honey and cinnamon. Awesome grilled banana sandwhich? Hell yeah!

You get what I'm saying. Stop wasting your money, learn some basic cooking manouvers and buy spices and other tasty stuffs.
This is what I like to keep in my kitchen, at all times:

Soy Sauce (Use this insted of salt. Adds taste as well as saltiness)
Tabasco Sauce
Honey
Vinegar
Pepper
Sage
Oregano
Garlic Powder
Onion Powder
Cinnamon
Cloves
Paprika
Curry Powder
Mint
Basil



You get what I'm saying? Yes, you do


Lazy Guy's BBQ Sauce

Are you so lazy that you want BBQ sauce, but you don't want to actually cook the sauce yourself, but you are still not lazy enough to just go to the supermarket to buy the sauce? Yes ?
Let's say then that you are a middle ground lazy. Well, I here have something for you.

Lazy guy's BBQ Sauce

One part Ketchup
Half part Maple Syroup
A quarter part of Red Wine Vinegar
A quarter part of concentrated tomato paste
A dash of Worchestershire sauce
A dash of Tabasco Sauce
(If you want to add something else, add something else. Some Oregano is good, for starters. Or some Jack Daniels. I  don't know)

Mix all the ingredients in bowl/blender. Stir. Enjoy.
You can now say that you have made your own BBQ sauce. It's kind of an half lie. It's not as bad as buying the premade product and then saying you made it. It's kind of bad.
So, now that you feel bad about yourselves being lazy, you can make this boil for about one minute or so (It will taste much better).

Now acquire meat, vegetables, Mc Nuggets or whatever and use this sauce



BUON APPETITO



Provolone/Tomato Burger

Prepare yourselves for glory. Prepare yourselves for another burger recipe.

Ingredients

Ground beef
Bread Crumbs
Onion Powder
Paprika
Salt, Pepper
Provolone Cheese
Tomato (A big round one type)
Bread/bun (Whatever)

Cooking Activities

Take the meat and mix it with bread crumbs, onion powder, salt, pepper and paprika. Shape the mixture into a patty form. Meanwhile toast the bread/bun (Whatever).
When the meat is cooked (Cook it the way you like to cook it) and the bread is toasted we can assemble this burger.
Place the meat patty on top of bread, place a slice of provolone cheese on top of meat, place a slice of tomato on top cheese and place other bread on top of cheese.

This burger goes extremely well with dipping sauces. I shall share with you the secret of a very simple dipping sauce. Simple, cost effective, but good.

Dipping Sauce Ingredients

One part Mayo
One part Ketchup
Half Part Raspberry Vinaigrette
Italian Balsamic Vinegar to taste
Tabasco Sauce to taste

Mix the ingredients, obtain the sauce. You can either put the sauce inside your burger or you can put the sauce on top of the burger or whatever. It's a pretty good sauce for a pretty burger

BUON APPETITO


Sunday, September 23, 2012

Blue Cheese/Arugola/Bacon Burger

An Italian guy sharing a burger recipe? Yes, bear with me, and you'll see what I'm talking about

First step: Obtain Ingredients

Ground Beef
Arugola
Mayo
Pepper
Salt 
Bacon
Blue Cheese (Gorgonzola if possible)
Bread/Buns (Whatever)

Cooking Activities

Season meat with pepper and salt (And whatever else you want). Shape into fairly thin patty. Place some dollops of blues cheese on top of patty. Then shape another patty, this one also fairly thin. Place second patty on top of cheese.
Grill the motherfucker.
Meanwhile toast bread and cook bacon. Chop some aruguola very finely and mix it with the mayo.
Now that bread is toasted and the meat is done we can assemble the burger.
Place meat on top of bread. Place bacon on top of meat. Place mayo/arugola mixture on top of bacon. Place some arugola leafs on top of mayo/arugola mixture. Place other bread on top of arugola leafs.

Now eat, but be careful. The melty cheese inside the patty is very hot.
Do you now see what I was talking about?



BUON APPETITO


Gin Pittaro

So, allow me to introduce you to my favourite cocktail ever.
It is called the Gin Pittaro. Why, do you ask ? I don't know.
I am the proud inventor of this awesome cocktail. And today I shall teach you how to make one of these fellows.



Ingredients :

Gin (London Style)
White Vermouth
Tonic Water
Ice

This is the type of drink to be drunk alone, watching action movies from the '80 or something. This is not the drink to be had in some discoclub type of deal. This is the stuff of weird monday night drunken movie marathons.
Anyhow. Get a glass. Fill the glass with ice, pour ingredients on top. Drink. Repeat till ingredients run out or you pass out.
This drink goes pretty well with the Bourne Trilogy too. I still have to watch the last one (So I guess it's not a trilogy anymore?) but I've seen the first three movies, in a row, while drinking these bad boys.
I don't remember much of the movies, but I sure had the feeling that they were good.

Pistachios Pasta

Today I shall share with you the recipe for the most awesome pasta ever. Pistachios pasta.



Step by Step instructions (Here we go)

- Obtain ingredients

Pasta
Olive Oil
Onions
Pancetta
Cream (Unsweetened)
Pecorino/Parmesan Cheese
Salt
Pistachios

- Grind up pistachios (The unsalted variety). Grind finaly half of the batch and more chunkily the other half.
- In a very nice frying pan cook diced up onions and pancetta with olive oil
- Make water boil
- Trow pasta into water
- Add cream to the onions/pancetta mixture. Stir with energy 
- When the pasta is done strain it. Then put it back in its pan
- Add onion/pancetta/cream mixture to pasta. Stir with enthusiasm

Serve the pasta in a suitable container. Add to the pasta a very large amount of pecorino cheese and ground up pistachios. Enjoy.

Q&A

Quantities ?

No. I'm Italian. I don't do quantities. Just use your good sense and follow your tastes. Do you want your pasta to be more meaty? Add more pancetta. More oniony? Add onions.
Just don't overcook the pasta. That you shall not do. As a general rule I'd say that if the pasta container says "Cook the pasta for 10 minutes" you should cook it for 9 minutes and an half.

BUON APPETITO